Peeled Sports

Peeled

Ime Udoka Takes Vow of Celibacy. Will Return to Celtics
It recently came out that Celtics head coach Ime Udoka was suspended a year by the Boston Celtics for...
Russell Wilson Will Donate $5000 Per Loss to the "Cute Puppy Animal Shelter"
If you were not watching the Broncos-Seahawks game on Monday night, you missed out on quite an event....
Brian Daboll's Balls Exit Nashville in a Wheelbarrow
It’s not often that a coach will leave a game injured. Sadly though, it will happen from time to...
NFL Elected King of England
The world was rocked on its side this Thursday when the beloved Queen Elizabeth of England passed away....
LSU Kicker Found Hanging By Underwear Tuesday Morning
College football is back! If you’re as big a football fan as we are at Peeled Sports then you spent...
Fantasy Football Last Place Punishment is to Marry Kendall Jenner
Fantasy football has become undeniably popular over the last few years. With the advent of sportsbetting,...
New MLB Schedule to Include 4 Football Games
It seems as though every time another sport makes a big announcement, the NFL follows up with something...
Small Time Lion Tamer Traded To An NFL Team
You guys remember Matt Stafford? He was a promising quarterback at the University of Georgia in 2008,...
Man Who Spent 30 Years Learning The Rules Of Football Emerges
Thirty years ago, a man by the name of Hugh Janus finally decided that enough is enough. He had been...
Doug Pederson Thought They Meant The Other Kind Of Tank
In an unexpected move by the former Super Bowl Champion, Doug Pederson went out in the last game of the...
Cincinnati Bearcats Save Queen From Assassin, Cure CTE And Find Amelia Earhart
By The Chief The Cincinnati Bearcats have certainly had a crazy year in 2020. It all started with a crazy,...
James Harden Kills Santa Claus: A Poem
By The Chief ‘Twas the week before Christmas, and all through the league, not a teammate had seen...
Local Dad Releases The Keys To Playing Golf Like A Pro
By The Chief It finally happened. A local dad who has been blessed with an abundance of spare time as...
Alex Smith’s Other Leg Gets Jealous And Acts Out
By The Chief On November 18, 1985, Joe Theismann’s life changed forever when Lawrence Taylor came in...
Andy Reid Confuses Refs For Encyclopedia Salesmen
By The Chief The Chiefs and Broncos were playing Sunday night at Arrowhead stadium when something more...
Will Fuller Finds New Way To Take His Early Vacation
By The Chief   Five of the last nine years, the Houston Texans have out-mediocred the rest of the AFC...
Nobody Is Sure What Final Score Of Missouri Vanderbilt Game Was
By The Chief   If you are a human living in the United States or possibly Canada, then you have most...
Conor McGregor Checks Out Of Attention Addiction Rehab To Get Back To Training
By The Chief     Nearly a year after the champion southpaw took down Donald Cerrone by technical knockout,...
Robbie Cano Not Allowed To Complete Punishment In Native Language
By The Chief   In another overbearing, dictator-esque move from the throne of the Major League, Emperor...
Russell Wilson Will Donate $1000 To The “Cute Puppy” Animal Shelter For Each Sack He Takes
By The Chief   I know, I know. Normally, if a quarterback decides to do a good deed for his community...
Arizona Man Arrested Pretending To Be Famous Baseball Player Tony La Russa
By The Chief   A man was pulled over just outside of Phoenix for driving under the influence of alcohol...
Why It Is Basically Impossible To Get A Concussion Playing Soccer
By The Chief   Ah soccer, the most popular sport in the world. You can go to just about any first world...
Kim Jong Un Shoots 19, Executes Scorekeeper
By The Chief You know Tiger Woods, Phil Mickelson and Justin Thomas. Players that have been touted as...
AJ Hinch Has Been Sent Back To Level 1
By The Chief There isn’t much else to it. The picture took a long time to make. He cheated. You get it....
Witch Who Hexed The Cowboys Gives Heartwarming Public Apology
By The Chief As many of you may know, this past Sunday the 25th of October, the Washington Football Team...
A Letter From The Mayor Of New York
By Bill de Blasio   Dear America, Hi, it’s me, Bill de Blasio. I’m 59 years old, love John Grisham novels,...
A Foolproof Guide To Beating The Atlanta Falcons At Football
By The Chief   So, it looks like you’ve found yourself face to face with the Falcons of Atlanta. Before...
Okay We Get It, Adam Gase Sold His Soul To The Devil Or Maybe Woody Johnson
By The Chief   How did we ever think this guy was just a regular person? In a not unanticipated move,...
NBA 2K To Add Women To My Player Feature
By The Chief   In 1848, 100 people including 68 women signed the declaration of sentiments. In 1920,...
Jets Can’t Even Catch Coronavirus
By The Chief   With COVID-19 reeking havoc all over the world, professional sports leagues are working...
Astros, Desperate For A New Source Of Cheating, Listen In As Radio Broadcasters Guess The Next Pitch
By The Chief   The Astros were just about as lost as that plane that crashed on the island with the others...
Ranking The Best Football Teams In The NFL
By The Chief Football is back! And us at Peeled Sports are planning on keeping you in the loop on all...
The Falcons Are Officially "Too Sad To Mock"
By The Chief   I was gonna say something mean about the Falcons after their second straight blown, double...
Steven Stamkos Returns From “Injury” Up 2-1 In The Stanley Cup Finals
By The Chief   Tampa Bay Captain Steven Stamkos just recently came back from a supposed injured leg....
Confused Raiders Fans Looking For Something To Be Mad At
By The Chief   The former Oakland football team is now officially the Las Vegas Raiders. In recent years,...
Unrelated: Chargers Doctor Seen In A Vegas Casino With Comically Large Bags of Money
By The Chief   In a recent tweet from NFL insider Adam Schefter, I learned how to spell his name correctly....
Photo Captured Of Nikola Jokic And Jamal Murray In Preparation For The WCF
By Uncle Geoffrey   Jokic (left) with Murray (right) upon seeing the opposing team practice before game...
Skip Says LeBron Can't Be The Best Because He's Never Beaten MJ
By Uncle Geoffrey & The Chief The ever popular ESPN panelist has come out with yet another take of...
A Passage From The Diary Of Odell Cornelius Beckham Jr.
By The Chief   March 3, 2019: Dearest diary, Upon review of attempts to reconcile with my employer, it...
Adrian Peterson Admits To Buttering Matthew Stafford's Ball
By The Chief   If you were watching redzone on Sunday, you most likely saw the end of the Lions Bears...
Andy Reid Finally Discovers A Way To Sleep On The Sidelines
By The Chief   Football in a time of covid. It would make a great title of a sports themed soap opera,...
Fantasy Football Hacks: The Kicker Strategy
  I know what you probably thought when you first saw this title- “Wow fantasy football hacks. That would...
The Tennis Mafia Is Back At It Again
By The Chief     The number one tennis player in the world and the obvious favorite to win the US Open...
NFL Will Allow Players To Wear Comfortable Shoes For The Anthem
By The Chief     It’s been a few years since the first player decided to take a knee for the national...
Zdeno Chára Will Join Fellow Old Man On Different Sports Team
By The Chief   Zdeno Chára has been in the NHL for a long time now, but after last night’s beatdown from...
Roger Goodell Discovers The Cure To Concussions
By The Chief   We finally have some good news to share in these unpredictable times. I know we’ve been...
Jacob deGrom “Doesn’t Even Care”
By The Chief   Two time Cy Young award winner Jacob deGrom is once again playing up to his pedigree....
Florida Man Is Heartbroken About Recent Events
By The Chief   In light of recent events in Wisconsin, all NBA games in Orlando have been postponed tonight...
The Incredibly Valid Reasons Why The NFL Requires More Education Than Police Departments
By The Chief   First off I want to state the basis for my case. I will stick to the Miami police department...
The Islanders Get One Step Closer To Escaping The Island
By The Chief     It’s been 36 years since Oceanic flight 815 dropped the squad on an island thought to...
Yankees Install Throwing Machine In Right Field To Play Catch With Aaron Judge
By The Chief   While Yankee’s star outfielder Aaron Judge has been sidelined with a calf strain, the...
Washington Football Team Will Release One Letter Of New Name For Every Win
By The Chief Dan Snyder has been taking lot of heat lately, mostly just for existing. His poor leadership...
Man Forces Wife To Charge Him $10 For A Beer While Watching The Sox
By The Chief   We all miss live sports. We miss the thrill of seeing our favorite team play from 200...
Kittle Deal Specifies All Money To Come From “Nerd’s Lunch Money”
By The Chief   George Kittle just signed the biggest TE deal in NFL history, getting a whopping $75 million...
Verlander Injury Caused By Running Back And Forth For Every Strikeout
By The Chief   Just after his first and only start of the season, Justin Verlander announced that he...
Breaking: Coronavirus Has A No-Hitter In The 6th
By The Chief   While pitchers like Shane Bieber and Trevor Bauer have started the season off insanely...
Wisconsin Teen Steals Giannis’ Talent But Gets Worse At Basketball
By Uncle Geoffrey   As we all know, when a basketball player gets too good, someone will naturally try...
Matthew Berry Deemed First Ever “Under-Essential” Employee
By The Chief                                        Berry after his recent trip to Antarctica to collect...
Small Sports Blog Gets A Lot Of Likes With Stock Pictures of Hot Girls
By The Chief There. Now like us.
Arizona Coyotes GM John Chayka Resigns To Pursue His True Passion Of Figure Skating
By Uncle Geoffrey   Just months after the General Manager made a big splash by trading for former Hart...
Devin Booker Overheard Singing About Dreams Of Playing At MSG
By Uncle Geoffrey     As games are beginning to get underway in the bubble, the Phoenix Suns star was...
Kelly Blames Sailed Fastballs On Recent Sign Changes
By The Chief   In case you haven’t heard, on the 28th of July in his first appearance against the Astros,...
Joey Chestnut Will Be Allowed To Attend One Dodger Game A Week
By The Chief   Chestnut after eating an undisclosed amount of Dodger Dogs The Dodgers will be sticking...
Covid-19 Breakout Potentially Worse For Baseball Than Rob Manfred
By Bob Bove   Major League Baseball’s inept commissioner Rob Manfred only learned about the coronavirus...
Derek Jeter Seen Coughing On Stuff In Marlin's Locker Room
By The Chief     “What??? They all got sick??” Derek Jeter said to our reporters. “Oh nooooo. That means...
James Harden Leaves Bubble for ‘Emergency Strip Club Matter’
By Bob Bove   Photo Courtesy of Barstool Sports Houston Rockets star James Harden has alerted team officials...
The President Calls In The Lefty
By The Chief   As Madison wrote in the constitution, the sitting president is the commander in chief...
San Francisco Giants Pick Up Free Agent Pitcher Dr. Anthony Fauci
By The Chief   Only moments after throwing out the first pitch at Nationals Park Thursday, Dr. Fauci...
Astros Will Hire Professional Trash Can Drummers
By The Chief     In response to some criticism about current trash can drumming going on in Minute Maid...
LaVar Ball Wants To Be The Official Ball Of The NBA
By Bob Bove     LaVar Ball has decided to enter the draft in hopes of becoming the next great Ball in...
“Maple Leafs Star Auston Matthews Considering Opting Out Of NHL Playoffs” 
By Uncle Geoffrey Matthews pictured learning information                 previously unknown to him As...
Super Bowl LV MVP: “I'm Going To _____”
By The Chief Orlando’s Disney World has officially opened back up. And in the very likely chance that...
Carmelo Anthony Comes Out As A Cake
By The Chief In a recent fad, people have discovered the world has more cakes than we previously thought....
UFC To Implement MRI Machines To Save Money On Judges
By The Chief   Last night, the UFC spent thousands of dollars hiring judges to tell us what we already...
Team Of Karens Emerging As Super Bowl Favorite
By Bob Bove     With the Washington Redskins future very much uncertain, a new force has risen to cause...
AJ Hinch "Opts In" To The 2020 MLB Season
By The Chief       In the weeks since the MLB announced the 60 game season, quite a few players have...
Exposé: Andy Reid’s Food Budget Was Cut, But He Found A Loophole
By The Chief and The Sciolist   ‘Squirt squirt”- Patrick Mahomes Just a little while ago, the Chiefs...
The Ancient Roots Of The White Sox And Indians
By The Chief     Long ago, before the MLB even existed, the Great Lakes region housed several tribes...
The Redskins Will Gradually Transition To A New Team Name
By The Chief The Washington franchise has been under scrutiny as long as I can remember. People have...
In Accordance With Social Distancing, NFL Games Will Be Decided By Psychic
By The Chief NFL scientists have been racking their brains trying to figure out a way to play football...
JJ Watt Traded To Katz Deli For A Pastrami On Rye And 5th Round Pick
By The Chief   In a not that stunning move, Bill O’Brien has decided to further hinder his team’s ability...
Roger Goodell Reportedly Has A "Patriots Cheated" Button That Is Very Fun To Press
By The Chief   “Hahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!!!!” We got about 45 minutes of that before the interview...
Colin Cowherd Admits That He Has Never Watched Sports
By Uncle Geoffrey     In an exclusive interview, we hooked Cowherd up to a lie detector test and asked...
Recently Discovered Photo Explains Why Aaron Rodgers Has Been So Sad
By The Chief   It feels like it’s been years since I’ve seen the future hall of famer crack a smile,...
Roger Goodell Hosts Large Shindig To Celebrate Ben Roethlisberger’s Recovery.
By Uncle Geoffrey     As soon as the news broke that Roethlisberger has bravely beaten his alcohol and...
Dick Dastardly Up To His Old Tricks At Talladega
By The Chief   Decades after Dick Dastardly spent every Saturday morning cheating and tricking his way...
Bill Belichick Will Finally Sue George Lucas For Stealing His Likeness
By The Chief Over forty years after George Lucas premiered the first of what feels like eight Star Wars...
Chargers say to Make the Team, Kaep Must Slay a Dragon with Nothing but a Football
By The Chief   Artist’s interpretation The Chargers recently told Colin Kaepernick that he will be given...
Kyrie Irving announces he will be sitting out the playoffs to protest the Earth being round. 
By Uncle Geoffrey   Jared Dudley tweeted that Kyrie has been calling players around the league to tell...
Yankees Draft Mike Trout’s Unborn Child
By The Chief Mike Trout and his wife Jessica recently announced that they are expecting their first child,...
The Reverse Burner Epidemic
By Uncle Geoffrey   2020. A time where your local basketball court is closed down, Hulu still has commercials...
Conor McGregor Checks into Rehab for Attention Addiction
By The Chief                            “My name is Conor McGregor, and I’m addicted to attention.”...
The NFL Academy Officially Opens its Doors
By The Chief   The NFL has taken a lot of heat in the last few years. Will Smith made a movie outing...
The Artificial Intelligence Barrier
By the Chief We all know the story of the first robot to put on an MLB jersey. Around 20 years ago a...
James Dolan Enjoying Quarantine; Hasn’t Made a Mistake in Months
By Bob Bove When the Woj Bomb dropped in early March that Rudy Gobert had the coronavirus and as a result...
The Porcello Effect
From the dawn of time, natural events have been dumbfounding the human race. Scientists are still kicking...
“The Match” Golf Balls Discovered to be Overinflated
By The Chief   Tommy after that one good shot In a shocking turn of events, the man most considered to...
Conspiracies in Sports Volume 1: The Torch
ORLANDO, FL – MAY 10: Michael Jordan #23 of the Chicago Bulls drives to the basket against Nick...
Parallel Universes in Sports
By The Chief   Working from home I haven’t really been keeping up with what day it is. I think today...