By The Chief While Yankee’s star outfielder Aaron Judge has been sidelined with a calf strain, the team has fallen on hard times, losing 7 out of 8 to Tampa. In those games, the normally high powered offense has been kept to under 6 runs in every loss. And in a season with only …
Yankees Install Throwing Machine In Right Field To Play Catch With Aaron Judge Read More »
By The Chief Dan Snyder has been taking lot of heat lately, mostly just for existing. His poor leadership of the Washington Football Team has provoked minority owners to demand he sell the team as soon as possible. In a recent meeting of the ownership, the minority owners demanded two things of the universally disliked …
Washington Football Team Will Release One Letter Of New Name For Every Win Read More »
By The Chief We all miss live sports. We miss the thrill of seeing our favorite team play from 200 feet further than the professional high definition cameras can capture, the 400 pound man behind you spitting peanuts onto your hair and of course paying $10 for a beer you could have gotten for …
Man Forces Wife To Charge Him $10 For A Beer While Watching The Sox Read More »
By The Chief George Kittle just signed the biggest TE deal in NFL history, getting a whopping $75 million over 5 years. The hard hitting TE has earned his keep, fighting his way to millionaire status, literally. Kittle is on the record saying that he prefers the violent aspect of the game over receiving. …
Kittle Deal Specifies All Money To Come From “Nerd’s Lunch Money” Read More »
By The Chief Just after his first and only start of the season, Justin Verlander announced that he was dealing with an injury that could keep him out for a minimum of 2 weeks. Verlander ended the game with 7 strikeouts, a low total for someone at his caliber. He pitched 6 innings on …
Verlander Injury Caused By Running Back And Forth For Every Strikeout Read More »
By The Chief While pitchers like Shane Bieber and Trevor Bauer have started the season off insanely hot, none have come close to the remarkable stats of undrafted right hander; Covid-19. Before the season I could have told you the Jake DeGrom would be riding high, or even young Max Fried, but I don’t …
Breaking: Coronavirus Has A No-Hitter In The 6th Read More »
By Uncle Geoffrey As we all know, when a basketball player gets too good, someone will naturally try and steel their basketball talent. First a team of aliens stole the talent of 5 high ranking members of the NBA in the 90’s, then a high school kid did the same to Kevin Durant. It …
Wisconsin Teen Steals Giannis’ Talent But Gets Worse At Basketball Read More »
By The Chief Everyone has been hit in one way or another by this wave of Covid-19. This includes sporting giant; ESPN. In a recent press release they made an unprecedented move and marked fantasy insider Matthew Berry an “underessential” employee. Here’s what a few members of the ESPN team had to say about …
Matthew Berry Deemed First Ever “Under-Essential” Employee Read More »
By The Chief There. Now like us.
By Uncle Geoffrey Just months after the General Manager made a big splash by trading for former Hart Trophy winner Taylor Hall; Chayka left the entire city of Phoenix in shock after his sudden resignation. Chayka explained that he was at home watching the highly touted film, Blades of Glory, when Chazz Michael Michaels …
Arizona Coyotes GM John Chayka Resigns To Pursue His True Passion Of Figure Skating Read More »
